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Original Air Date: September 29, 1985 Review completed June 18, 2006 "Cheaters Never Win" Punky has a problem; she has a test on the state capitals that's she's sure to flunk. Allan's in the same boat, but he has a solution; write the answers on his body. Punky, not wanting to fail, decides to join in the cheating, and she and Allan are the only ones in the class to earn perfect scores. Mike has an unexpected reaction, placing the two into advanced studies, which forces them to study for hours a night. When report card time comes, both are shocked to see C's on their reports. Mike checks his books and informs them of the F's on their first test; he's known all along that they've cheated. Mike played along to teach them a lesson, and now Punky gets her punishment by facing Henry about the report card. One small change, for this time around anyway, is that I'm going to completely abandon the usual scene-by-scene approach and just mostly touch on the character roles and some noteables. Really, there's no need for the scene-by-scene, as most everything in this episode proceeds as you'd expect. Besides, the plot is okay, but it's not the kind of noteworthy that I think the characters are in this one. Can I start with Allan? Put it to you this way; it's not going to make a difference what the answer is. Besides, it's the closest he'll get to a starring role until... well, until "Divorce, Anderson Style". Y'know, his last episode. Allan is great in this episode. I've yet to find anyone who doesn't like the guy in Punky fandom, and it's probably episodes like these that are the reason why. Part of the reason is that in this, he has a plot that plays to his strenghts; both because the intellectual challenges help reinforce the dumb part of his character without making him annoying, and because pairing him off with Punky makes for a good team. If I had to point out a reason, I'd say it's because both Soleil Moon Frye and Casey Ellison have that certain timing down that helps out the gags immeasurably, and putting both of them together to work on those makes everything run smooth as silk. I'll shout out his reason for writing the answers out and his freak-out over the advanced learning as lines of the episode from him. "No, not another state!" Good stuff. Another little touch of note: The method of cheating is probably old enough that caveman will be unearthed any day with "fire=hurt" written on their arms. This series may have no qualms about using the occasional cliché, but even Punky is going to need to jazz that one up. Having said that, Allan looking down his shirt, up his pant leg, and I'm not sure I want to know where else was pretty funny to watch. And it's not like it was a dumbed-down gag either, as the obviousness of such action figures into the story in that "everything has a place" way that I like. Mike, aside from his usual authority role and not-so-usual keen grasp on the situation, actually makes out good in this episode too. I wanted to punch him in the "The KO Kid" (and sadly, that's not going to be the last time), but he makes good here. His main impression (yes, with another appearance from Asian Overblown Reaction Kid...) is a G-rated version of R. Lee Emery's drill sargeant from Full Metal Jacket that's actually pretty good. He then goes on to give something looking much more like an actual lesson than the puppets from "KO Kid" and, will wonders never cease, actually stays on-target and serious during the scene revealing the revised grades. Good thing, as this keeps the story building smoothly and nicely. Good job, TK. Punky's still worthy of some note as well, though she spends maybe a bit too much time playing straight against Allan. And she still can't sing. However, most of the serious parts go well, and the very well-built joke of Punky miming a dagger to the heart (brought on by Henry's sad face) is one of my favourite Punky moments without a doubt. And Punky conveys the moral strongly; a bit too strongly occasionally, but the moderation is still much better than what we'll find later on. Margaux will get just a quick mention, since she's on-screen for maybe three minutes and gets a handful of speaking lines. But that's really all you need for her this time around (and her last apperance in the episode is a filler gag anyway). Mainly, she just does what she does best: Open a can of bossy snoot all over her friends. (Oh, and the back of her clipboard says, "THIS BELONGS TO MARGAUX HANDS OFF!" The More You Know...) Cherie's role in the episode, aside from a horror story of cheating to death, is "I never got to the "W"'s". Meanwhile, Cherie Johnson prays for Season Three to come so she can get a solid part in an episode. Henry comes across, for the most part, as 'warmly generic'. Sure, he does fulfill his quotient of foot-in-mouth with his boasting to Betty (incidentally giving her her obiligatory role of the episode), and shows a few sparks of his usual self in his concern over how he could handle parenting, but he's pretty much just a stock parent figure for this episode. What can I say; I like cranky Henry, but he's not here. It isn't his episode, sure, but he still seems a lot less like Henry when he does show up. I think that's just about everybody who shows up in the episode, save for some kid with half a grocery store in his desk (which, I imagine, looked much like David Duclon's). The plot is solid and, if unexciting by itself, makes for a nice framework, but the characters within it bring it to life and give the episode a distinction, especially in Season Two. The episode wins, even if Allan can't. That poor, hilarious goofball. - Jimmy Vibes |